The Perfect Gene on Jesse Michels

I was hiking solo. New year, no phone, no gear. I was just trying to find myself. That's when I saw it. Something glowing, silent, descending through the trees. A UFO. And stepping out from it wasn't an alien or an android. It was me, but better. Same face, same great hair, but something was different. This guy had perfect posture. He was wearing the perfect jean. And they start at just $79. Six fits, sizes for every thigh on this timeline and beyond. Now, 2026 me wears the perfect jeans. They don't crush my thighs or my dreams. They're soft but dangerous. For a limited time, our listeners get 15% off their first order plus free shipping at theperfectgene.nyc or just Google the Perfect Gene and use code JESSIE15 for 15% off. That's 15% off for new customers at theperfectgene.nyc with promo code JESSIE15. After you purchase, they'll ask you where you heard about them. Please support our show and tell them we sent you your khakis and get the perfect gene.